I heard Russell Quaglia speak a few days ago. He has researched the connection between student aspirations and academic success -- and has identified eight conditions in schools that affect student aspirations. His work is interesting, but I've been thinking about one particular thing he mentioned.
The first condition he recommends that schools cultivate has to do with creating the sense of belonging while preserving the individuality of the student. He noted that the scariest thing about school is not the AP Physics or the high stakes testing or college acceptance. He says the scariest thing about school is walking into the lunchroom alone..... the fear of having no one to sit with.
He talked about how to increase the likelihood of 'belonging' in schools, but he went on to say that the need for belonging doesn't go away when we become adults. His comments made me think of the many situations where adults crave that sense of belonging and the many coping mechanisms people devise.
A friend commented after hearing Quaglia that the success of the organization where I work is related to the active way we extend "belonging" to newcomers.
I assume that the deep, fundamental need to belong has played itself out in many ways in our society......in Welcome Wagons for folks who move into a town, maybe in the greeters at WalMart, belonging to country clubs, belonging to churches, maybe being a member of Sam's, and so on.
I'm going to watch for more signs of this need for belonging and how it is manifested in the people and circumstances around me. I think this deserves more attention.
4 comments:
It is interesting to me that all three of your blogs are in some way about community. There are so few things more important. I wonder if there is a cord inside a person that is sometimes striked causing one to reflect on relationships. How can we create strong community around us? Will community be able to evolve as technology and communication evolve or will these changes leave us feeling empty?
My thought is that changing technologies and communication media simply alter the MEANS of engagement. The fundamental desire for community trumps the barriers and/or tools we have.
A generation ago, people visited with the people in the stores and at the bank. People sat on their front porches and talked to people walking by, visited with neighbors. Today I use an ATM and pay at the pump; I barely know my neighbors and will go for months without seeing them. However, today we have seen the incredible rise of talk radio, chat rooms, blogs like this one, and the ubiquitous use of the cell phone!
The difference today may be that we have to SEEK community. It doesn't happen as naturally as it did in the past.
Also, another difference today is that it is easier to talk (practice community) only with like-minded people. I think this is the point for concern. It is creating a great divide, a community gap that is potentially damaging in many ways.
Aside from the fact that the Wal-Mart greeters were put there to stop shop-lifting I like your post. I think that America has been greatly aided by our outlook on individuality, as it allows us to push forward at any cost, towards our goals, and we do so.
But the people that do achieve success, usually monitary in this country, find that they don't have any of the things that they really wanted. As a society, we have traded the core of what we are, for our greatest desire. Even our community seems to be found in television these days, becuase that is 90% of what I hear people talking about these days, and is there anything more fake than television?
So the next question is: how do we go from here to where we want to be?
I hear what you are saying about trading our core for our desires. Maybe that's part of what's behind God's instruction to Abraham to sacrifice Isaac; was Abraham to focused on the gift in place of the Giver?
In response to your final (rhetorical?) question, I think we as a society have started on the road to where we want to be. I realize I'm at risk of sounding like the optimist I'm accused of being (and am!) But I see great hope in the dialogues that spring up in blogs. I am encouraged by the thinking and debating. To me, the scariest thing is when people don't talk, don't disagree, don't seek. Iron sharpens iron.
Post a Comment